Instagram filters might suggest that smaller noses are in vogue as you might say, but if science is to be believed, men with larger noses should stand proud and brandish that side profile as regularly as they can. According to a recently published study, those with larger noses are found to have longer penises, too. All this time women were measuring a man’s hands when really, the answer was right there on their face all along.
In a study published to the Basic and Clinical Andrology, researchers from Kyoto Prefectural University of Medicine looked at the corpses of 126 men (ok, a bit bleak we must admit) within three days of death and measured a range of body parts. The researchers looked at height, weight, length of their penis when flaccid, circumference of penis and weight of their testicles, too.
It was found that men with bigger noses had a ‘stretched penile length’ of at least 5.3 inches and that men with smaller noses have a penis length of 4.1 inches when erect. If this has you raising your eyebrows at just how such a thing is measured on a corpse, the researchers went on to add that the accurate way to replicate the length of an erect penis is to lay the cadaver out and pull the penis up as far as it would go, giving them the ‘stretched penile length’ or SPL as they deem it in the scientific world.
As the researchers concluded, “The fact that nose size is related to SPL indicates that penile length may not be determined by age, height or body weight but has already been determined before birth.” Huh, interesting.
Analysis of the data also revealed that the length of the men’s noses correlated with the size of the penis. In Japan, the average penis size is 4.5 inches, according to a different study. Even so, researchers are just as perplexed as we are on why there is such a correlation between nose size and penis length. “Although our results are useless for forensic purposes, understanding the growing process of the penis or facial features may be very important for extrapolating metal androgen levels and following male genital functions.”
The study authors added, “This study is the first to demonstrate the relationship between SPL and nose size but is limited in Japanese male cadavers, and the reason why SPL and nose size are related is still unclear.”
Still, it makes for interesting food for though, especially if you’ve been on the receiving end of jokes about the size of your nose. Now, you can simply turn around and let science explain the rest as you watch the eyes of those making fun of you sink in disbelief and, ultimately, defeat.