Doggy style is dope. It gives you just enough personal space while hitting that G-spot like a boss—and gives you easy access to get your rocks off with your digits (or a sex toy if that's your thing).
But, despite our best efforts, our head is not always focused on how damn good it feels. And if you're a gal who likes to bow-wow-wow-yippee-yo-yippe-yay, you probably know what we mean.
Here are 12 thoughts bound to enter the female brain when someone enters them from behind.
1\ "My Butt Must Look Fantastic Right Now"
There really is no greater angle for your backside. Large, small, round, or flat—everybody's shape shines when they're on all fours.
2\ "But My Boobs Have Definitely Seen Better Angles"
All lady lumps look like udders when they're poised for doggy style, and that's a fact. Thankfully, nobody's really getting the full visual on milking season.
3\ "Um, How Often Should I Be Turning My Head Back To Look At Him?"
The beauty of this position is the freedom to not lock eyes - but isn't the occasional glance appreciated? Oh no! Neck cramp!
4\ "Please Stick To The Orifice We Agreed On!"
'Cause nobody's looking to get a penis shoved into a hole that wasn't prepared for it. Dude, just stay in the designated bone zone, please.
5\ "Whelp, That's Going To Leave A Slobber Mark"
Sometimes we find it sexy to push our face right into the pillow, but that also leads to drooling because we're humans. Just know there's going be some serious condensation on these linens post-coital.
6\ "I Wouldn't Be Opposed To You Telling Me How Hot I Look Right Now"
We're vulnerable, we're being penetrated, and our ass is on full display. Even the tiniest of verbal affirmations would be appreciated.
7\ "You've Got To Commit To That Hair Pull"
Not all women like their mane yanked while they're getting boned from behind. But for the ones who do, he better bring his A-game. The gentle tug isn't going to cut it. Grasp it like the sex god you probably think you are, man!
8\ "His Hands On My Waist Just Took This To Another Level"
This speaks for itself. Is there anything sexier than a dude grabbing your waist as he thrusts? Thank you for this romance novel moment, sir.
9\ "Whoa, Are You Having Sex Or Channeling Rage?"
Doggy can go from amazing to awkward in a millisecond. When we said harder, we didn't mean human jack-hammer mode—we'd still like our cervix intact after this.
10\ "Can We Break To Ice My Knees?"
Sure the mattress is better than the floor, but either way we don't want to flare up an old high school basketball injury due to an intense sex sesh. If you want to bust out some actual kneepads, maybe our stamina could be extended.
11\ "Hold Up, My Legs Aren't That Flexible"
When we're on all fours and you want to squish (so to speak) us down even more, we're game. But let us gently ease into that R-rated yoga pose. Nobody's limbs are made of rubber. So take it easy, Stretch Armstrong.
12\ "You Came, Right?"
We can't always tell when we're not looking at you, but it sure sounds like you crossed the finish line. And, while it was fun and all, we can only take so much before we're ready to stand upright again and have a snack.
This article was originally published on WomensHealthMag.com