‘Tis the season of undying love, steadfast commitment, and holy matrimony. Every month, couples repeat their vows and become husband and wife. But, what happens when the giddy groom is unable to complete the sacred act of “becoming one” with his beautiful bride following the wedding? Well, according to a recent study, a sexual condition, referred to as honeymoon impotence, may be the culprit for this wedding night snafu. And, guess what? It’s more common than you think!
The good news is honeymoon impotence doesn’t have to squash your post-wedding sizzle. No, thankfully, there are things you can do to stop it from raining on your sex parade!
What is Honeymoon Impotence?
Honeymoon impotence is a form of erectile dysfunction. It is a condition that prevents a man, in our case a newlywed man, from achieving or maintaining an erection long enough to complete the act of sexual intercourse. Honeymoon impotence is more common in societies that view pre-marital sex as “taboo.” But, it can also happen to more experienced “open-minded” men.
It is important to note that it is common to have jitters during “first-time sex” or “wedding night and honeymoon sex.” However, for some men, these jitters lead to a host of sexual issues, such as premature ejaculation, delayed ejaculation, or erectile dysfunction.
What are Possible Causes of Honeymoon Impotence?
Impotence could be caused by a number of physical and psychological factors. In the case of honeymoon impotence, it is usually believed that the cause is psychological in nature. More specifically, according to recent studies, honeymoon impotence is linked to performance anxiety, stress, societal pressures, relationship dissatisfaction, fear of disappointing a partner, etc.
The truth is anxiety can become so overwhelming that it can trigger impotence. When the body is under intense stress, blood flow to the penis which is necessary for erection decreases, and erection problems arises (no pun intended).
Honeymoon impotence can also stem from physical factors. A study on honeymoon impotence found that not all men with this form of erectile dysfunction develop it because of performance anxiety. In fact, according to researchers, approximately 28% of men with honeymoon impotence experience it because of a physical reason – not because of performance anxiety. Still, results suggest that for most cases, honeymoon impotence stems from psychological distress and performance anxiety.
Furthermore, when a man is unable to complete sexual intercourse with his partner, during those first sexual encounters, he may feel compelled to “correct” the problem. So, he frantically tries to perform the act during future encounters - only to experience impotence again. Once again, he becomes discouraged and either sexually withdraws from his partner or becomes angry and lashes out at her. It’s a vicious cycle that can destroy even the strongest couples!
Luckily this condition can be overcome using a few simple relaxation techniques. For details check out this article we wrote on this topic.
Are certain men more likely to suffer from it than others?
The truth is most newlyweds (from westernized countries) are not afraid of “wedding night and honeymoon sex,” because their first sexual encounters were probably many years ago. However, for men, who are virgins before marriage, there is a real fear that they will be unable to sexually satisfy their partners.
In more religious societies, pre-marital sex is forbidden; therefore, couples are not allowed to have sex for the first time until their wedding night. This places a heavy amount of psychological stress on the couple, possibly leading sexual dysfunctions.
With that said, psychological erectile dysfunction can strike even the most sexually experienced men. Stressing out about having the perfect wedding and honeymoon can lead to unwanted results. So, if you tend to put a lot of pressure on yourself when it comes to these things you might be at a higher risk.
Honeymoon impotence can be quite a downer, especially if you have waited months or years to have sex for the first time. This form of erectile dysfunction may be due to nerves, stress, a health condition, anxiety, and/or psychological distress. Regardless of the reason, this bedroom glitch doesn’t have to ruin your honeymoon. In fact, you may be able to rebound from it with the help of a few simple relaxation techniques. With a few tweaks, you’ll be up and running in no time at all!
Dr. R.Y. Langham holds a Master of Science in marriage and family therapy and a Ph.D. in family psychology. She serves as a professional consultant for the Between Us Clinic, which provides sex-therapy online programs for men and couples experiencing premature ejaculation.