Don't ask a dancer for personal information.
"Every girl has different boundaries, you should always ask/communicate with a girl to understand what she is or isn't okay with," said one woman. "My stripper name is the only name you're getting because it's a way for me to safely conceal my identity from potentially predatory men. No you wont get my phone number either, you can look up SO much information about someone just from their phone number. This industry is still underground and largely stigmatized, we have every right to protect ourselves."
It's important for customers to remember the transactional nature of this relationship. The perfect customer, as another commenter put it, is one who says: "I will respect you as a person by offering you money for your labor and skills." She compares the job she does to any other kind of service industry work: "I don't really see a big difference between this and the guy who thinks the girl at the coffee shop is flirting with him. Dude, she has to be friendly, she's at work. Smile, buy your latte, and move on, unless you're going to buy another latte I guess."
No haggling or trying to get freebies.
One of the reasons men will try to "get to know" a dancer is because they think that will lead to them getting special treatment or some kind of discount. Guys, that is not going to happen. And quibbling over price won't get you very far either. "Don’t ever try to haggle with the dancer over what this money could get you in another club," said one self-proclaimed "veteran" stripper. "Don't harass the waitresses for lap dances either; get a dance from the dancer."
Another stripper has three simple, easy rules that she expects customers to follow: "Pay per song. Ask before you touch. Don’t beg for kisses or oral."
And finally... Be careful what you wear in a strip club.
One of the more surprising pieces of information to emerge on the thread was not about how customers act, but what they wear, and what to do in order to avoid embarrassment in the unique lighting. "Make sure you don’t pour laundry detergent directly on your clothes when doing the wash or you look a hot ass mess in the black lights at the club," read one comment. "The phosphors in laundry detergent are essentially black light paint."
This article originally appeared on Men's Health